Dear Blondes,
Are you old school when it comes to dating? What are your opinions on girls asking guys out on first dates?
- Schooled
Dear Schooled,
Somewhat. I do recognize that every woman is different and every man has to assess the situation with EVERY woman to decide whether he should offer to pick her up, or meet there, or whatever. I don’t play games, and will be as straightforward and transparent with someone as I can be. If I like you, it’s dang obvious. If I want you to pick me up, I’ll say “sure, did you want to pick me up?” and so on. It’s part of who I am. The world is simpler and easier for everyone when people are transparent and honest. And yes, I do want you to pick me up.
I don’t ask guys on dates. I have done so previously, but I don’t anymore. I, along with CJ, strongly believe that the man should step up and do the pursuing. And if a man likes you, he will. No questions.
What about you guys?
- Blondie
For once I disagree with you. At least on the “the man should step up and do the pursuing” part. I’m perfectly fine doing the pursuing (especially with people like Blondie who are open about their feelings; none of that “I’ll pretend I’m not interested so he has to pursue even harder” bullcrap). And in 90% of the cases in our culture, it probably goes smoother if the guy does the pursuing.
But I don’t think it’s a case of should. If a woman likes a guy and he’s not making any moves, then why shouldn’t she make the first move? If two people are happy reversing the stereotypes that nature and culture have programmed us with, then I’m all for it.
Honestly, I agree with Phronk (did I just say that, hmm felt weird…), if you’re interested why not ask a guy out. It could be that the guy isn’t asking because he thinks you’re out of his league or that you aren’t interested, or he just hasn’t realized yet that you’re the perfect girl for him. I asked my husband out on our first date, it didn’t mean he took a backseat and I did all the work, he just thought I wouldn’t be interested.
I say if you want to see if there is something there don’t wait for the guy, why not ask him out?